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Interview With A Novelist



Didn’t expect another interview? Just kidding, you should've been as I have hinted at this since Oc..October. Sorry for the wait but here we are with A Novelist or as I’ll now call them for humorous effect, The Lafayette Slappers, Creatures Of The Prog Lagoon (I know it’s bad shut up) or Bayou Diamond. That’s right, I’m putting the Lafayette native and eternal UFC lightweight contender Dustin “The Diamond” Poirer into question! Please don’t kill me Dustin.

Anyways, this particular duo plays a highly technical blend of prog and death metal with strains ranging from Bayou music to ye olde familiar - black metal. It’s wild, impressive and fun.

So with this absolutely horren…epic introduction first things first. How you been kings? A lot has happened since Folie’s release and I am definitely not only alluding to that pulmonary disease but life in general.


Ben: Hey Fran, hope you are doing well and thanks for having us. That’s a mighty fine selection of synonyms however I might add that Alex and I have not lived in Lafayette for quite a while.

So, we certainly would not qualify for the title of “Lafayette Slappers”. Though, I do believe the other ones are indeed laudable and appreciated with the utmost gratitude. "Creatures of the Prog Lagoon" is my favorite. I am a huge fan of Dustin Poirier. He’s the real deal. For the longest time, he was an underdog. I love the underdog.

I’m going to give it to you straight. I think I have made progress but it would be a total lie if I didn’t say that the last couple of years have been really strange and at times unenjoyable. At times, it has seemed as if we are existing in an alternate timeline or at least that is something I have found myself occasionally contemplating. You look back and see past trajectories and can identify what you believe are their future target outcomes or an expected approximation. You might think of future trajectories in comparison to your current and maybe can identify a potential of multiple common outcomes.

You may even be able to identify multiple rate limiting factors across these various timelines that might even seem to increase your knowingness and certainty of the likelihood of their future target outcomes.

However, I would submit that you would likely have never anticipated any of those timelines occurring at the same time as a global pandemic or the changes that would occur. Which is kind of humorous in a way because growing up when I did I feel like I heard over and over in multiple Discovery channel/TLC shows about how the climate was going to worsen and there would be increased risks of deadly pandemics. I’m in my thirties now. I worked in healthcare as an RN in the ER of a trauma center for the entirety of the pandemic.


Working in a place like that, pandemic or no, really offers one a great deal of perspective. You see what people do to themselves and to each other. You witness and become a part of the spectrum of responses to many varieties of extremity. If you are willing to be even the tiniest bit introspective it can absolutely change you for the better. I think that is something that is a byproduct of this type of work. It will make you grateful for the things that you have and for the things that you do not. I also started going to jiu-jitsu in the last year. I haven’t been in a bit because I’ve been working in New Orleans but it’s something that I really enjoy. It was a good move for me and I encourage it for others. Obviously, I have also been writing lots of tunes and playing guitar. A Novelist has approximately 3 albums in the can. I also have a couple albums worth of “solo” type stuff.


Alex: I’ve been good. I've recently started a new career path in funeral service which takes up the bulk of my time, and I’ve also been playing and recording with some other projects around New Orleans. It’s been busy but life has overall been good. I’ve been eating a lot of cheese.

The lads.

Loveloth: That’s quite a healthy and measured way of looking at it and I support that! Witnessing such things in real life must be quite heavy, especially when paired with social media and media in general constantly showcasing the uglier, more "clickable" side of humanity. Luckily my pandemic period was quite the opposite.

At that time I still haven't moved out and spent most of my days doing what I usually do, reflect on shit.

Reflect on myself, things and people around me, where I am and where I wanna be, all that djazz. In fact, if anything I had more time to work on stuff.


Amidst all that chaos the thing that angered (and saddened) me the most is realizing just how many people out there actively avoid being with themselves. We’re talking the most basic level of self-awareness or introspection. But peeps be peeps and by now that era is behind us. What matters is both of you powering through and continuing working on yourselves, that’s what it’s all about babyyy. And cheese, always up for it.

Seriously though, you two really picked just about the best professions if you wanna ponder existence and the human condition hahaha. Oh and congrats on taking jiu-jitsu Ben, love to see it!

Have nothing of that sort to share but I am very physically active and practically live on my bike so that's cool... OK seeing we’ve got a lot to cover and we already started off strong, let’s talk music first. We know what you play (techy progressive death metal) so I’m interested in what MADE you play this way. How did your musical story begin and which people influenced you the most?

Alex: I could go on about this for a long time, but if we’re talking specifically drumming and not music in general, then the source is Joey Jordison. His drumming on the self-titled Slipknot album as well as Iowa blew my mind at the time. As I got older I found faster and more technical drummers that inspired me to go even further, but my earliest foundation in metal drumming was trying to emulate Joey. I also drew a lot of inspiration from geeking out on DCI snare line videos in high school. Those guys are always insane and fun to watch.


Random pic of young Joey. RIP.

BEN: I have one of the most cliche answers ever but I swear it to be true. I grew up wanting to be a drummer. My parents wouldn’t let me. They said it would be too loud. I grew up listening to the standard thing. On my bedroom wall as a child, Bruce Lee, Jimi Hendrix, and Led Zeppelin. I worshiped Jimmy Page and Jimi Hendrix. I knew nothing about shred guitar. One day, I was listening to the radio and the song “Walk” by Pantera came on. I was completely blown away by the solo and thought wow you can do that with guitar. I instantly started listening to Pantera and learning their songs. A few years later, I met a classmate who just by chance happened to know virtually the entire Pantera catalog on drums. I was a Freshman at a Catholic Highschool in Louisiana and a total guitar nerd. I would miss school and play sick just so I could play guitar all day. At the same time I was also introduced to Killswitch Engage and Lamb of God. Within the next year (2004-2005) I discovered Necrophagist, The Black Dahlia Murder, The Mars Volta, Jason Becker, Cacophony, Marty Friedman, all the Shrapnel guys, Aphex Twin, Behemoth, Opeth, The Red Chord, Charlie Parker, and BTBAM. Plus, a whole lot of others. Everyone of which absolutely was or had already pushed far passed boundaries that I thought existed. Blew my mind. Some of those made me obsessive over technique. Some made me realize writing is literally any color you like. I still listen to those albums today.


Loveloth: Well I really can’t argue with the Joey pick Alex! As someone who started his "heffier" metal journey with nu metal, I still and will always respect Joey and his contributions behind ze kit. Explains some things about your playing as well which I missed.

As for your picks Ben, I also share the same sentiment. Adore the drums. Cliche or not, I’m very glad your basis was formed around bigger bands before transitioning to a completely different but logical pool of sounds. Logical if you’re based of course.

Pantera are a band that I did enjoy for some time but grew to get bored by before starting to dislike them. But respect where it’s due, that tone and way of playing changed things and I am sure this respect is even stronger down south. They wore those influences in a cool way and it’s something A Novelist does too and much better in my opinion. Killswitch Engage and Lamb Of God on the other hand, I adored back in highschool. And unlike many names that appeared on my now deceased gold 4th gen iPod Nano, some of which you mentioned (F you beautiful thing), I still find myself revisiting some of their albums. Oh and of course some attending Catholic school would find themselves enjoying Behemoth. I did too and you can be sure that my country's fiercely religious background helped fuel my angst and defiance hahaha.

Necrophagist and Mars Volta kick ass, goes without saying and Opeth are still one of my all time favorites so you can guess how I feel about them haha. Finally saw them last year and gods what a great show… Anyways, glad seeing you mention BTBAM. A lot of online outlets compared you to them, for good reason but I found the occurrence of just their name a bit disappointing considering how different you sound to them.

Just wanted to say that. So, what about these days? Any bands or players that are particularly inspiring?



Ben: Over the last few years, I have been totally enamored with a band called The Armed. I’ve been following them since their Untitled album. Love their music and artistic direction. I also recently discovered Ludovisco Einaudi. He is a magnificent composer/pianist. When I get bored with guitar, I play piano or keyboard of some sort. Recently, I have also been listening to The Police, Louis Prima, Van Halen (Roth era), Poison the Well, Louis Armstrong, Dr. John, The Cure, Aretha Franklin, and a band Alex showed me called Victory Over the Sun. I’ve kind of kept the old Louisiana guys on rotation for the last 15 years or so.



I also wanna mention Wes Hauch and his playing. He has an interesting sound and wicked lead playing. There are so many amazing players in the world today. There is another excellent player named Galen Stapley. Galen is an absolute shredder and a real player. Galen plays in a band called Azure. I am also a big fan of horn players. If you haven’t yet, you should definitely check out Axiom by Christian Scott Atunde Adjuah. Absolutely amazing live album with incredible atmosphere and top tier playing from all the artists involved.


Alex: I don’t feel inspired to emulate like I did when I was younger so much anymore, but every so often I hear a record that can break me out of whatever routine monotony I’m in and feel the need to just play. The last record to make me feel that way was probably Ultrapop by The Armed (also one of Ben’s favorites which I’m guessing he’ll probably also say here.).

Loveloth: You were right Alex haha! But yeah my dudes, The Armed! I remember discovering them around 2017 but fully getting into them with Only Love. And one of the things that made me love them was the celestial being known here as Tommy Wiseau. Back then I totally fell in love with The Room so seeing the man (manifestation) himself vibing alongside their music is truly iconic. If you somehow missed this gift from the astral gods then allow me to make your day with this!



Great great band and one whose acclaim I feel is completely justified!

Very happy hearing that Wes praise Ben, he is the real deal. Overlooked as hell. Unique tone too. Not acquainted with the other picks so more music for me! Oh and I totally echo your enjoyment of horn players. I feel sax has become overused in the last six years or so.

And while the sax is featured on Folie, I actually love its inclusion as I find it tastefully implemented.


So, to try and remain on track, I’ve been wondering about a few things.

Your lyricism Ben. It’s… quite impressive honestly. And because I haven’t seen pretty much anyone delving in it a bit deeper, I wanna jump in and see what’s up. Lyrically you cover a lot of ground and use a lot of complex words but it’s all done in a healthy and evocative manner which I honestly haven’t noticed until I started reading them. From what I gathered, and I may be completely off here, Folie seems to be a ghost story intertwined with a rebellion going on in the real world. I say ghost because the protagonist is deceased as hinted in “Exteriors”.

He belonged to the House of Auto-da-fe and this family is central to the story. I really like how their name directly references a public act of sentencing and then punishing heretics. Given how ingrained Christianity is in Louisiana and how Protestants are actually the biggest group there, I wonder did that influence your writing in the way it did? And did you start writing with this religious angle in your mind or did it arrive as you were writing?


Ben: Thanks Fran, I spend a lot of time thinking on the themes and lyrics. I think this is certainly true in metal but also just in general, most people do not care to read the lyrics or attempt to derive any meaning from them but with our first two albums that was definitely supposed to be a part of the experience of the music. Folie is sort of a fictionalized or surrealist account of a period of 5 years towards the end of my Father’s life.

In real life, during that time he had a stroke and began to develop dementia both of which retired him. He was this larger than life figure to me growing up and even as an adult. He lived a really impressive life and spent his time helping people. If you had a problem that could be fixed, he could fix it. At the end of his life though there was almost no one there to help him aside from myself and a few others. It was a tough time and made me really bitter towards a lot of folks.


Rarely, in life you may encounter unconditional love. You likely will not realize how rare it is until you no longer have it in your life. When it is gone, you really feel like you’re missing something that was integral to your life. It does not come back. During that period of approximately 5 years or so, I gladly changed the course of my life to take care of him. I became responsible for him in virtually every way and was happy to be able to do it but I would be lying if I didn’t admit that it was painful to watch someone I cared so much about decline. I felt like he deserved more at the end of his life. I had to try and fill his shoes and take on all the things he had been dealing with and at that time I was heartbroken to discover the monumental challenges he had faced alone for years. He had been battling these things against insurmountable odds and was always unflinchingly optimistic and unafraid.

Before the end of his life, I was able to resolve many of these issues and he was still cognizant enough to realize it. They were some of my greatest and most difficult accomplishments to date and they involve things that you can’t frame and hang on the wall. We still suffered great loss that likely will never be reacquired. All of it made me realize the unimaginable amount of sacrifice he had made for myself and others. I was able to give him a comfortable life in his last few years. In the last year of his life, he had declined cognitively quite a bit but still knew who I was and would tell me every day “I love you and I’m proud of you”. He was my best friend and greatest supporter. Last year he passed away in my arms. His last words were “I love you”.

Loveloth: That’s… beautiful. And explains some things, well a lot of them. Certainly true about proper love and it’s a shame how some acted towards your dad but that’s unfortunately the case with a decent number of folks I feel. For me my mom was always there for me and her value became even more clear as soon as I moved out. And you should be proud of yourself and your accomplishments and I hope this doesn't sound tacky but I think he would be proud of Folie and what you’ve done and are doing in life! Genuinely mean it.

With all this now in mind, I wanna know what your writing process looks like.

I presume you take care of the lyrics so where does Alex come in? Do you compose together, re-iterate your demos or something else entirely?



Ben: It typically starts with me hearing a melody or something and working it out on guitar. A lot of times I use the recorder on my phone and sing the melody. Sometimes it’s a rhythm. Sometimes it seems like full songs. I work it out on guitar. Put it to the appropriate tempo and grind it out. Then everything else follows.

Occasionally, I’ll have a vocal melody or a bass line that makes a song but it typically starts with one thing and I build around it. Alex and I used to live a lot closer but as previously mentioned neither of us live in Lafayette anymore so there is lots of demo sharing. We get together in New Orleans and work out the ideas in a practice space.


When it comes to drums, we spin it around a lot. I have an idea that sticks with me from the beginning or initial session where I write/record the strings. Alex has his idea that he gets from his working out the demo. We get together and sometimes we have the same ideas and other times we have different ideas. We always try out quite a few variations. One my way, one his way, one where I compromise, one where he compromises, and then variations on everything but Alex writes the majority of drums. It’s a lot of experimentation.

Sometimes, the drum composition he comes up with makes me hear different and better music and changes a song completely. We have so many alternate versions of our songs. It gets kind of ridiculous at times but it’s even more difficult to ignore the potential it could bring out for the song.

ALEX: Generally speaking, I’d say I write about 80-90% of the drums, but for most songs, or the ideas which eventually become songs, there’s often a discussion of an idea that Ben has in mind for the overall feel of the thing. A song demo for us often undergoes a ton of changes before it becomes what it actually is.

Loveloth: Love to hear it! Discussions, compromising and a LOT of re-iteration are a given when it comes to how bands function but I feel like you don’t hear a lot about them in promotion, interviews and so forth. Bands either don’t mention ‘cause it feels implied or you have those hyperbolic press releases that place extreme value with the fact bands go back and forth when recording. I actually love reading them hahaha, I find them super fun for some reason. Especially on Bandcamp.

Speaking of which, I remember immediately noticing Jamie King’s name in your personnel section on Bandcamp back when you released Folie and that, I feel, is a big thing so I wanna know more. For those who don’t know or forgot, King is most known for his work with The Contortionist, Between The Buried And Me as well as other less known gems like The Reticent and many more. How did that come about and what was working with him like? I also wonder if he'll reprise his role on your upcoming album?


A Novelist: It’s honestly a product of me being young and naïve and Jamie being a good dude. I literally was looking at the engineers/producers for albums that we both liked and trying to find their contacts online. I sent emails to a lot of those people and some replied and some didn’t. Some wanted a bunch of money. Jamie was really reasonable and professional. He was also very supportive. He strikes me as being a genuinely good guy. He is now an engineer/producer that has Grammy nominations under his belt now though so we will see what happens with the next album.

Loveloth: Hear hear. How is that new album coming along by the way? Listened to the demos you sent and I am liking the direction! Has even more black metal elements but that insane virtuosity and fun factor you always manage to balance is still there. And while we’re on topic, what’s the status on Nethermost Majesty? If you don’t know, that’s Ben’s, Alex’s and Eric Clark’s black metal band.

Ben: The next A Novelist album is on its way. I expect us to release it some time this year. The material is all there and there are demos for every song on the album. We currently have approximately 3 albums or more worth of material. I think it comprises our best work to date. I think it really solidifies our sound. It’s original, progressive, melodic, heavy and maybe even more accessible in some ways. I think it will surprise people. I really want to play this stuff live. When it comes to Nethermost Majesty, we have around 5 to 6 demos of new material. We had a really good writing kick until Covid started in the States. Eric and I hang out pretty regularly and are working on new stuff currently. The writing for Nethermost Majesty starts with Eric. Eric shows me his guitar parts and I often write the second guitar and bass. For the newer material, I also write riffs and sort of present them to Eric for approval. There are actually several new songs that do not yet have demos. Eric and I literally just got drunk tonight and made spaghetti. We also hope to have a release in the near future.


Alex: I am unsure as to what the status is, but I am ready for recording at virtually any time should Ben and Eric put forth the material for a release. Eric is a busy guy and has a family, so I’m sure it’s not his highest priority, but I’d very much enjoy making a proper release with that project.


Loveloth: Excellent news! Three album’s worth of material? Let’s go! Shout out to drunk spaghettis! Love your readiness Alex and I’m sure whatever you three cook (🤭) up will be properly seasoned and thermally processed, worthy of your music chef statuses. Metal Chef film when Jon Favreau??

OK, let’s get back to your lyrics a bit because I noticed how you often times describe thought processes, be it character-driven or in general. Do you have a particular interest in psychology and psychology-adjacent topics and if so, how did it come about?

Ben: I love science. Before I worked in healthcare, I had a biology degree and minored in chemistry. If I would have had a second minor it would have been in philosophy. Science explains many of the mysteries of the world. Sometimes when we encounter things that science may not explain we can use logic or philosophy in its stead to help us understand. I think those types of things usually involve human behavior. Science, philosophy, evidenced based medicine are all topics that I really enjoy. A lot of times, I will read about a mechanism or principle and I can’t help but recognize its similarity to certain aspects of life or human behavior. Those sorts of things make for great metaphorical tools. One of the most obvious ones that I think about quite a bit is equilibrium. I find that at times life can feel like things are being pushed to the left to dissociate or sometimes far too quickly to the right to completion before you’re ready. I mainly feel like I am trying to keep things from being pushed to the left but oftentimes if you can identify and understand the nature of the individual components and the rate determining step you can improve your odds. Your methods of control revolve around the parts of the equation, their properties and how you are able to exert influence on these parts. At times, there are outliers that occur outside the realm of your control or knowledge that can also exert influence. You have to constantly be identifying and adjusting accordingly in order to avoid an undesirable outcome. It’s a simple comparison but I think it makes sense.

Loveloth: As much as they’re watered down, MythBusters for me, were the thing that made me interested in how certain things operate from a more scientific angle because of how boring and math-heavy our high school program was. Plus our teacher sucked hahaha. Plus plus I really liked philosophy back then too, still do. Got to the penultimate tier of philosophy competitions in muh country back in my last grade of high school so that was fun! Haven’t been reading at all but I sorta keep track. Plus plus plus, I always end up referencing Occam, Kierkegaard or Montagne more than I should sometimes hahaha.

And I like your comparison. Every person has their way of trying and figuring out that balance and interpreting the mechanics of attempting to keep said balance. I do it like anybody and while I am unsure how I visually represent it to make, the effort, I like to believe, is there and shall continue to be there as it should!

To not repeat myself I'll just state how I always loved hearing about how people think about stuff and work on them so thanks for the share!


So… I wanna focus on you Alex now, hope that’s okay... Just kidding you have no choice! Seriously though, I consider myself a rhythm-first guy. I’m one of those foot tapping, table slapping and air drumming dudes who look like they’re on the spectrum hahahaha.

Jesting aside which I’m definitely not prone to, when it comes to your playing, obviously we have the prog-influenced expressiveness and creativity but alongside it there is this death metal-like sense of urgency and momentum and crazy blast precision only the best in black metal are privy to. It’s the whole damn package but what caught my ears initially was the amount of groove. There are A LOT of groovy sections with intense double bass action with occasional crazy Dirk-like blasting to break it up.

Feeling some Gene Hoglan, Hanness Grossmann and Martin Lopez appreciation emanating from your style. Is there truth in this statement? I sure hope there is because I’ll look pretty daft if this isn’t the case… no pressure me hehe. Alongside (hypothetically) them, what other names, if any, in the Drummerverse™ inspire you today or played a big role in your formative years?

Alex: You’re definitely not wrong, those guys are killer and I’m familiar with most of their output. I’m surprised to hear you say that about groove though because I personally feel my playing is very blast-forward and am usually wishing I had a higher level of expressiveness like a Grossmann or a Rudinger. I don’t tend to focus on individuals very much though, not just for drums, but for music in general. It’s pretty typical for me to have no idea who is in a band, but to be very familiar with their output as a whole. It’s also rare that I listen to a band solely for their drums. A lot of what I listen to these days is rhythmically a lot more relaxed, or at least slower than what I typically play. My favorite band for years now has been Alcest, and I admire how Winterhalter is able to shift back and forth from a black metal drummer to a restrained and solid atmospheric rock player. Every note feels intentional, and nothing wasted. I’d like to feel that way about my playing someday.

Continuing with the drummer theme, random Winterhalter appreciation photo!

Loveloth: Well I don’t know if this means anything to you but I feel you play with intention and minimal “waste”. Yes it’s dense but never to a point of numbness or boredom. As stated I think it’s one of the band’s key features which is why I wanted to focus on it for a bit. Very much appreciate Winterhalter getting a mention, his sense of dynamics and subtleness makes Alcest Alcest.

And a cool observation came to my mind right now. Feels obvious but not that often mentioned I feel. It’s the difference between musicians and fans. Due to my preferences I focus on the rhythm first but eventually I have the whole picture but your and mine way of reaching and looking at it are completely different I am sure.

And because of this blog thing, I kinda had to remember the names, not because of anyone else but me being that guy from the start haha! With that said perhaps most musicians aren’t nearly as focused on gathering as much knowledge given that they’re focused on honing their craft?

Again, seems quite obvious but given today’s climate and influx of independent blogs on social media, I think people sometimes lose the plot and focus too much on how a thing sounds on the surface level instead of why does it sound like that and of course, understanding the intricate (and highly repetitive and grindy) process of creating art. Food for thought I guess… Moving on now, I wonder what role, if any, do films and other media formats play in your music and presentation?


Ben: Over the years, I have found film and art very inspiring. I am a big fan of surrealist art and film. I also love the aesthetic of the noir and giallo genres. However, I am a fan of any medium that can move me. A lot of films from those genres I mentioned are just dripping with atmosphere and emotion. When it comes to making an album though, I definitely think about it like it is a film. I have a sort of storyboard in my head. I have wanted for the last two albums to have a short film that corresponded dynamically with the music. Unfortunately, that is far easier said than done. I am no videographer and neither is Alex. I think that film/videography/cinematography are probably some of the most involved and difficult artforms to master. Additionally, I don’t know that I have the time or aptitude for it. However, I would love to have some short films or something like that for our next release.

Loveloth: I am inclined to agree as so many professions are needed in order to make a film. However, one could say the same thing about music so you never know!

Love noir films, The Sweet Smell Of Success being my favorite, a must watch!

As for giallo, I’m not a fan but I can’t nor won’t deny its sense of atmosphere and wonderful colorizations. Plus lust, lots of lust hahaha. In any case, fingers crossed for that short film idea!


This was super fun my dudes so let’s top everything off with a bang. I know, I can hear gasps happening across the globe so here’s a fun one.

When it comes to animals, Louisiana seems pretty wild. Even wilder after a bit of research. Dem gators obviously but also vipers, jellyfish sharks, scorpions, spooders, you name it. The coral snake in particular is so spooky that people even created a rhyme to more easily differentiate between it vs. the chill king snake as they look very similar.

So my question for you fine gentlemen is as follows: What are your craziest wild animal story and which animal obstructs and comes in contact with your people the most?

Alex: Mais you ain’t kiddin, baw, dem gators outchea, yeah. I’m not sure if I’d call it crazy, but some years ago Ben and I had a jaunt through a swamp preserve cut very short because of a very large mama boar and piglets blocking the way further. As far as what wild animal obstructs the most often here in New Orleans, I’d have to say that’d be drunk people.


Ben: I grew up on a lake. In my Dad’s office, on the walls were pictures of alligators he had caught over the years and one picture of my cousin and myself with an alligator on a line. One of my Dad’s friend was Mr. Blalock. We called him “the Alligator Man”. He would come set lines, hanging chicken quarters during the season and catch alligators and give us some of the meat. If the bait got stolen, we would go put chicken quarters on the line.

My cousin and I had the bright idea one day, when I was probably 13 to go check the lines which is something we’d done before but this time we were going to get the alligators ourselves and show everyone else. We were total idiots. Not only is that dumb considering our age but it is also illegal. You can’t just go kill alligators for fun. Even though people do and I know plenty of people that have, you’re not supposed to just go kill alligators for fun in Louisiana. There was a cypress tree on the bank with a line hanging in the water.

We go and check the line and there is a huge alligator.


Fun fact: the largest ever recorded alligator was found in Louisiana. 5.84 meters (19 feet). However, gator attacks are rare like sharks so don't fall for the narratives.

We start pulling the line like idiots and this thing is going crazy. My cousin says “Ben, grab the line and just keep pulling it tight. I’m going to get the gun”. We obviously had not fully thought this one out. So, I’m backing up a muddy bank pulling this rope tight and all the sudden the hook comes out of the alligator’s mouth flies by my head. I fell on my ass in the mud scrambling backwards and slipping everywhere. I see this giant alligator and he had mercy on me. He took off, splashing me and scaring me to death. That was probably the best possible outcome of that entire scenario.

I have about a million and a half stories just like that one. I was a bored kid that lived out in the woods in a rural area on a lake in Louisiana in the 90’s. I grew up hunting and fishing. I ate fish so much growing up that I still cannot stand to eat it maybe once a year.

I don’t really hunt or fish anymore. I like just watching the wildlife. My dad used to barbecue/broil these killer pieces of tail meat. It’s not as easy to get pieces of alligator meat like that today unless you get in on the lottery or know someone. Alex, myself, my wife, Chelsea Self, and Ty Hebert have gone down to the Barataria in Crown Point, Louisiana a few times in recent years. It’s in Jefferson Parish. It’s a great place to check out if you ever find yourself in Louisiana. Barataria, La is what you think of when you think of Louisiana. All those folks except for Ty are on Folie. You’ll hear Ty Hebert on the next A Novelist album.

Loveloth: I was expecting something amazing but you surpassed my expectations hahaha. The Alligator Man?? Someone call up Lynch and tell the story from his perspective hahaha! Seriously now, I don’t think I need to add anything you aren’t well aware of already. That was stupid and very lucky but it was needed. We all do stupid shit as kids, in my case I didn’t have large reptilians but anything works to be honestly.

At this point over ten years ago during summertime and near our coastline, my friends and I decided to build a small wooden “house” in the nearby forest… It was more of a shack but it had a firm base, multiple stories and an open space beneath its roof that you could climb up and chill under the shade.


Anyways, we did it and felt hella cool so next year but this time we got a brilliant idea and move it closer to civilization and of course we decided to build it on an incline. Not a small one either but the soil was firm and that section of the incline was flat enough.

So we did the very possible and like last time the “house” had multiple stories, a door the aforementioned roof spot. Guess what happens next. We have to have someone take a picture of it, an adult preferably because look at us go!

The mastermind’s dad comes and all of us who were a part of the building process strike a pose. Most were in front of it squatting (as Slavs do) and a few thinner ones were underneath the roof ‘cause we at least understood the hypothetical risk.

As soon as his dad took a picture, the whole construction crumbled hahahaha. We’re talking milliseconds here. Keep in mind this had nails, boards, everything needed for a wooden construction so imagine the sigh of relief that no one decided to be on the lower floor. That person would be crushed by not only the weight of the thing but also by two or three people sitting on the roof section.

So fucking stupid but hey, it was fun… and now I realized how that whole process of building looked a LOT like “Lord Of The Flies” HAHAHA.

Anyways, I absolutely plan on visiting the US of A one day and Louisiana, alongside Illinois, Kansas, NY and others are on my hit list so I’ll def contact you when I get here AND I’ll check out Jefferson Parish. I’ll keep in mind the fish “angle” hahaha. Don’t eat them that often but when I do, they’re from rivers.


Very cool that you’re repping your peeps on your albums by the way, noticed the large credits section on Folie and I’m looking forward to the follow up and all the contributions that will manifest! This was truly fun so a big thanks for your patience and thank YOU for reading. Until next time.

 

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